Is it too late to back out?

Today James and I went to my appointment with the ENT. For the most part it went well. We had to wait over an hour to see the doctor because he was running behind. When we did get in we talked about our different options. Several times the doctor kept saying that he usually does not do theses two surgeries together. They are both abrasive and are difficult recoveries. He kept trying to decided if we could get away with only one of the surgeries. After rechecking my throuat and nose about five times each he decided that we had to do both and that it would be best to do them at the same time. He did say that it would be a difficult and painful recovery (that's just wnat you really want to hear). Also because he is doing them at the same time then I will have to stay in the hospital. There is concern for swelling and bleeding so when they are convinced that those things are under control then I can go home. Recovery is 2 to 4 weeks. I can't be alone for the first week and then I am on strict restriction for the second week. If all goes well then the next two weeks should go pretty well.

We are hoping that the kids will be able to go to my sisters for a few days but that is still to be determined. I'm still not sure how to take care of things for the 2-4 weeks that I will be down. I am a very independant person and I know that it will greatly challengly me to have to rely on the help.

I have also never had surgery so this is all new. I am praying that this surgery will really help. The doctor says that I should be able to breath so much better. At this point I have one good nostril to breath through and a small opening in my throat. When I go to sleep that small area in my throat basicly closes off. That only leaves the one good nostril. Either way I am just praying that the pain and expense is woth it. I really want to be healthy for the James and the kids. I really do not want to back out but I have to admit I am a little anxious. I know "be anxious for nonthing". I'm trying to put that verse to heart.


By the way I still intend to post about our trip but I want to post when I am able to add pictures.